How to Play With Your Newborn: A Guide for New Parents

Young mom plays with her newborn baby

Learn why playtime is essential for your newborn's development and discover activities that foster bonding and growth.

Updated: 29 Aug 2024

9 min read

Amanda DeLuca's profile picture

Written by:

Amanda DeLuca

Founder & CEO of Riley, Certified Pediatric Sleep Consultant

If you're the parent of a newborn, you've probably learned that your baby isn't yet able to stay awake for long periods of time. In fact, newborns spend most of their time asleep - according to the American Academy of Pediatrics, newborns typically sleep 16-17 hours per day.

As a new parent, you may be wondering what to do with your newborn for the 7-8 hours that they are awake during the day. This can feel more challenging than you might have anticipated - newborns aren't able to do very much, and it can be difficult to know whether or not you're stimulating their brains in the right way. The good news is that playing with your newborn is simpler than you might think! Even better, play and awake time is important for your newborn's bonding and development. Let's explore some fun, easy ways to play with your little one.

Why Playing with Your Newborn Matters

Before we dive into the how, let's talk about the why. Playing with your newborn isn't just about having fun (though that's important, too!). It's about:

  • Bonding and building a secure attachment
  • Stimulating brain development and learning
  • Supporting physical development, like fine and gross motor skills
  • Encouraging social and emotional growth

Even though they may not yet seem very responsive, newborn babies are like sponges - your baby is soaking up every sound and expression they see from you during active time. And, by month three, you'll start to notice your baby showing more interest in play and communication. They start to recognize faces, smile, and even coo back at you. This is the start of their social and emotional development.

How to Play with Your Newborn: The Basics

Playing with a newborn doesn't require fancy toys or complicated games. Here are some simple ways to play:

1. Talk and Sing to Your Baby

Your voice is your newborn's favorite sound. Try these activities:

  • Narrate your day as you go about your routine. For example:
    • "Mommy is changing your diaper."
    • "We're walking into the kitchen so that Daddy can get a glass of water."
  • Sing lullabies or make up silly songs
  • Read aloud - even if it's just the newspaper or a cookbook.

The important thing to note here is that it's not about what you say, but how you say it. Use a gentle, singsong voice (often called "parentese") to keep your baby engaged.

2. Make Faces and Eye Contact

Newborns love looking at faces, especially yours! Try these games:

  • Make exaggerated expressions - big smiles, wide eyes, stuck-out tongue
  • Play peek-a-boo (even if your baby doesn't laugh yet, they're learning!)
  • Slowly move your head from side to side, encouraging your baby to follow
  • Point to and name parts of your face, then point to and name those same parts on your baby's face. For example:
    • "Here is Mommy's nose, and here is Isla's nose!"
    • "Daddy's eyes are open, Caleb's eyes are open!"

3. Tummy Time

Ah, yes, the famous tummy time. Tummy time is a great way to help your newborn build back and neck strength, and it's safe to do tummy time starting from the day your bring your little one home from the hospital.

That said, many parents (and babies!) struggle with tummy time. A phrase I hear often when talking to parents of newborns is "but my baby hates tummy time! She screams every time!". And, honestly, I was there, too - my daughter seemed to despise tummy time for weeks before we got the hang of it. Here are some tips for how to make tummy time fun, or, at the very least, less of an ordeal:

  • Get down on your baby's level and make eye contact.
    • This is another great time to pull silly faces, sing songs, and stimulate their brains
  • Place some high-contrast flashcards and/or a mirror at eye level in front of your baby
    • This tip is almost universally successful among the newborn parents I've worked with - babies love looking at high contrast images, and their fascination will usually distract them for a minute or two!

Two other pieces of good news about tummy time:

  • It can be short. I often recommend starting with short sessions, 30-60 seconds each, or for as long as your newborn can tolerate being on their tummy. If you can get one minute of tummy time each time your baby is awake during the day, you're doing great.
  • It doesn't just have to be on the floor! A common misconception about tummy time is that it can only happen on the ground or on a flat surface. Not so! Any time that your newborn is on their tummy supporting their own head and neck counts. Here are some other ways to get tummy time in:
    • You sit semi-reclined in a chair or rocker and lay your newborn on your chest, encouraging them to look up at your face
    • Awake in a front carrier
    • "Flying" position: support your newborn's tummy with your hand and forearm, lift them up and "fly" them around the room (this was my daughter's favorite!)

4. Provide Sensory Experiences

Newborns learn about their world through their senses. Try these activities:

  • Gently massage your baby's arms, legs, and back. This can be a great pre-bedtime activity, too.
  • Offer different textures to touch - soft blankets, crinkly paper, smooth balls
  • Make different sounds to get their attention - shake a rattle or squeeze a squeaky toy and try to have your baby follow the sound with their head and eyes
  • Play with contrasting patterns - black and white books or cards are great for this

5. Move and Dance Together

Even newborns enjoy movement! Try these:

  • Hold your baby close and sway or dance to music
  • Gently bounce your baby on your lap
  • Do simple exercises together, like bicycle legs. Bicycle legs are great for helping relieve gas, too!

Remember - you should always support your newborn's head and neck during any movement activities.

6. Encourage Safe Mouth Play

Newborns explore their world through their mouths. This is completely developmentally appropriate, and is a natural and important part of their development. Here's how to support safe mouth play:

  • Offer clean, safe teething toys with different textures - food-grade silicone is a great choice here
  • Let your baby suck on your clean finger (with trimmed nails)
  • Observe as your baby discovers their own hands and fingers

Mouthing objects is not just about teething or hunger - it's a crucial way for babies to learn about their environment. Mouthing may actually influence vocal development, potentially contributing to consonant production and variety[1] - how cool is that?

As a general rule of thumb, try to wash any toys your baby is regularly putting in their mouth once every day or few days.e every day or few days. Most silicone toy

6. Get outside!

Weather allowing, a great way to "play" with your newborn is to take them outside! The outside world is full of wonderful things to see, smell, hear, and look at - all great ways to stimulate your baby's growing brain. Even better, exposing your newborn to daylight can help them regulate their developing circadian rhythm (which is great for combatting day/night confusion)[6].

Here are some easy ways to get outside with your newborn:

  • Take a walk. Put your newborn in a stroller or front carrier and take a walk! Even a short, slow walk around the block will give them lots of sensory stimulation.
  • Put down a blanket. One of my favorite things to do when my daughter was a newborn was to take her into our backyard, put down a blanket, and let her roll around.

Newborns definitely benefit from sunlight exposure, but their delicate skin generally can't handle too much direct sunlight. While newborns are generally too young to wear sunscreen, you can safely take your baby outside by making sure they're well-shaded (either in their stroller bassinet or in a shaded area, like under a tree or awning).

FAQs About How to Play with Your Newborn

Q: What are some simple activities I can do with my newborn?
A: Here's a quick list of easy ways to play with your newborn:

  • Talk and sing to your baby
  • Make faces and maintain eye contact
  • Supervised tummy time
  • Provide gentle massages
  • Show high-contrast patterns or images
  • Read books (any books - it's your voice that matters!)
  • Dance or sway while holding your baby
  • Play gentle games like peek-a-boo
  • Offer safe objects for mouthing and exploration
  • Take "tours" of your home, describing what you see
  • Get outside!

The key is interaction and engagement. Your loving attention is the best toy for your newborn.

Q: How long should I play with my newborn?
A: "Playtime" technically happens in the short wake windows between naps. For specific, active play - short sessions of 3-5 minutes several times a day are perfect. Watch for signs that your baby is overstimulated or tired, like looking away or fussing.

Q: Do I need special toys to play with my newborn?
A: Not at all! While some toys can be fun, your face, voice, and gentle touch are the best "toys" for a newborn.

Q: My newborn doesn't seem to respond when I try to play. Am I doing something wrong?
A: Not at all! Newborns aren't developmentally capable of responding socially beyond staring for the first 5-6 weeks. And, newborns have short attention spans and may not show obvious responses. This is normal, and you're doing great. Pretty soon, they'll be engaging in active play with you!

Q: Is it okay to play with my newborn right before bedtime?
A: Gentle play can be part of a great bedtime routine, but avoid overstimulating activities (like lots of big, exciting faces) close to sleep time.

Q: How do I know if my newborn is enjoying our play?
A: Look for signs of engagement like eye contact, moving arms and legs, or making sounds. Even so, your baby may be having a great time and still seem unresponsive or uninterested. This is normal! Even if your baby seems unresponsive, they're still benefiting from your interaction.

Conclusion

Playing with your newborn doesn't have to be complicated or stressful. The most important thing is spending time together and showing your love. As you figure out how to play with your newborn, remember that every baby is different. What works for one might not work for another, and that's okay.

Enjoy these precious moments with your little one. Before you know it, they'll be crawling, walking, and running circles around you!

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